Via Cat Rambo, Weird Tales is having a flash fiction contest.

You’ve seen the latest wave of spam — you know, the faux outrageous news headlines: “Osama trains goats for tactical bombing.” “Laika the Russian space dog returns to Earth.” “Children admit to being little shits: Video.” Isn’t it a shame the headline is all we get? So here at Weird Tales we’re inviting YOU to turn this spam into… um… spam-ade!

Write a story under 500 words inspired by spam. If you need some inspiration, I’ve collected spam from a few friends and collated it here. I’ve filtered out some of the noise, like foreign character sets and some of the duplicates, but be warned that there is still a good deal of mature language.